Wicked Witch Of The East Song Wicked

So, you know how sometimes a song just sticks with you, right? Like, it burrows into your brain and sets up camp, and you can’t get it out for days? Well, that’s been me lately with this one tune from Wicked. Yeah, the musical. You know, the one that gives the Wizard of Oz a whole different spin. It’s called “No Good Deed.”

But here’s the funny thing. The song is by Elphaba, right? The Wicked Witch. But the title of this little chat we’re having is about the Wicked Witch of the East. Talk about a curveball! Elphaba is definitely Wicked, don’t get me wrong. But she’s more of a misunderstood genius, right? Like, brilliant but a bit prickly. The East Witch, though… well, she’s a whole other kettle of fish. Or, you know, a whole other shriveled old shoe.

Anyway, “No Good Deed” is such a powerhouse of a song. It’s like Elphaba has this massive realization, this… epiphany, if you will, about how everything she’s ever tried to do for good has just backfired. And it’s sung with such raw power. You can practically feel her frustration, her anger, her… despair. It’s intense, man. Like, “I’m done with being nice” intense.

But it got me thinking. What about the actual Wicked Witch of the East? The one who gets famously squished by a house. Seriously, a house. Talk about a bad day at the office. Did she have a theme song? Probably not a very cheerful one. Maybe something with a lot of cackling and, I don’t know, the sound of tiny, angry bees?

It’s such a quirky detail, isn’t it? The Wicked Witch of the East. We don’t know much about her, do we? She’s mostly just… there. Until Dorothy lands on her. Pretty anticlimactic for a villain, if you ask me. Usually, you get a big showdown, a dramatic monologue, maybe a chase scene. Not this lady. Just… squish.

Imagine the planning that went into that. The cyclone, the little farmhouse… it’s all a bit chaotic, don’t you think? And then BAM! A house lands on you. Talk about an unceremonious exit. It’s almost… comical. In a dark, morbid sort of way, of course.

Now, I’m not saying the East Witch was a saint. Definitely not. She wore those sparkly shoes, for goodness sake. And she was apparently in league with Elphaba’s dad. Not exactly the best company, is it? But still, you’d think she’d have some kind of narrative arc, wouldn’t you? A little backstory. A reason for being so… wicked.

Maybe she had a terrible childhood. Maybe she was bullied by the Munchkins. You know how kids can be. “Nyah nyah nyah, you’re a witch!” Or maybe she just really, really hated gingham. Some people just have strong opinions about fabric, I guess.

And her song! If she had a song, what would it be about? Would it be like Elphaba’s “No Good Deed”? A song about how nothing she ever does for evil goes according to plan? Like, she tries to steal all the cookies, but then the oven explodes? Or she tries to curse the village, but she accidentally makes everyone’s hair grow really, really long and shiny? So, not exactly evil, but definitely annoying.

Or perhaps her song would be more of a… a lament. A mournful ballad about the pressures of being a wicked witch. The constant expectations. The pressure to be consistently menacing. It’s a tough job, you know? You can’t just be having an off day. No, you have to be terrifying, even when you’re feeling a bit peckish or you’ve got a headache.

I’m picturing something like… “Oh, these silver slippers, they’re so fetching, but they pinch my toes something fierce. And this pointy hat? It keeps getting caught on the broom. My life is such a drag. And don’t even get me started on the flying monkeys. So needy.”

You know, in the original book, the East Witch is actually described as old and ugly. Which, I guess, fits the stereotype. But in the musical *Wicked, they sort of leave her backstory pretty vague. Which is fine, because the story is really about Elphaba. But it does leave a little… void. A witch-shaped void, if you will.

And what about those ruby slippers? Or, in the book, silver slippers. Either way, magical footwear. They must have had some serious power. Did she cherish them? Did she polish them every night? Or were they just… there? A prop in her witchy wardrobe? I bet she had a whole closet full of them. Different colors for different occasions. A pair for formal witch events, a pair for casual broom-flying.

It’s funny how the musical Wicked manages to take characters that were pretty one-dimensional in the original story and give them so much depth. Elphaba, the misunderstood outsider. Glinda, the popular girl with a heart of gold (or at least, a heart that’s trying its best). And the Wizard, who turns out to be not so much a wizard and more of a… hustler. Pretty neat, huh?

But the East Witch, she’s still mostly a footnote. Or a rug, depending on how you look at it. And her song… well, that’s where our imaginations have to do the heavy lifting, I suppose. If she had a song, it would probably be short, sharp, and to the point. Like, “Cackle, cackle, doom, doom, doom! Now, where did I put my spellbook? Oh, right, under the house. Oops.”

The “No Good Deed” song, though. It’s a banger. It really is. It’s that moment where Elphaba decides she’s had enough. She’s going to stop trying to fix things, stop trying to do the right thing, because it’s clearly not working. It’s a song of pure, unadulterated frustration. And it’s relatable, in a way. Who hasn’t felt like that? Like, no matter what you do, it just goes wrong?

She sings about how her attempts to do good have only brought her more hate. And it’s true! She’s trying to save people, trying to make things better, and all she gets is ostracized and feared. It’s a cruel twist of fate, and the song captures that brilliantly.

And then there’s the line, “I’ve heard every accusation, / Hypocrisy, and malice, and injustice, / All those thing you’ve said about me, / You lie! You lie!” It’s such a powerful outburst. You just want to hug her and tell her it’s going to be okay. Even though, you know, it doesn’t exactly end all sunshine and rainbows for her. Spoiler alert!

But back to the East Witch. Let’s get a little creative here. What if her song was a duet? A duet with her sister, the West Witch? Imagine those two cackling together, plotting world domination. “Sister, dear sister,” the East Witch might sing, “this kingdom is ripe for the taking!” And the West Witch would retort, “Indeed, my dear! And with these magnificent shoes, we’ll be unstoppable!”

It would probably involve a lot of dramatic gestures and maybe some evil laughter. The kind that echoes through cavernous rooms. And it would definitely be about power. About ruling. About making everyone else miserable. You know, the usual villain stuff. But with a catchy melody, of course. Every good villain needs a catchy melody.

The thing about the East Witch is that she represents a kind of wickedness that’s almost… simplistic. She’s the evil stepmother, the bad guy in a fairy tale. No shades of grey, no complex motivations. Just pure, unadulterated badness. And that’s almost refreshing in its own way, isn’t it? No need to overthink it. She’s bad because she’s bad. End of story. Until the house.

And that’s the tragedy, isn’t it? Her entire existence, her whole wicked persona, reduced to a building landing on her. It’s like, all that effort, all that cackling, all those plans… for nothing. Utterly and completely nothing. It’s a little bit sad, in a way. A little bit… pathetic.

So, while Elphaba’s “No Good Deed” is this epic anthem of defiance and disillusionment, the East Witch’s hypothetical song would probably be more of a… a cautionary tale. A story about getting too comfortable, about underestimating your opponents. Or maybe it would just be a very short song. A jingle, almost. “Wicked Witch of the East, can’t be beat! Until a house makes her obsolete!”

It’s just a fun thought experiment, you know? Taking these characters that we think we know and wondering what else is going on beneath the surface. Or, in the East Witch’s case, under the house. And while “No Good Deed” is a song that Elphaba sings to herself, a moment of private realization, I like to imagine the East Witch had her own little soundtrack playing in the background of her life. A soundtrack that was tragically cut short. By a house. Still cracks me up, that.

So next time you’re humming “No Good Deed” (and you totally should, it’s amazing), just spare a thought for the Wicked Witch of the East. What was her story? What were her dreams? And did she ever get her toenails done? These are the important questions, people! The ones that truly matter.

Maybe her song was just a lot of grumbling. “Oh, this dust is terrible. And my broom needs a polish. And is that a fly? Honestly, the service around here…” The mundane struggles of a wicked witch. It’s probably more realistic than world domination, if you think about it. We all have our bad days, right? Even the wicked ones.

And who knows, maybe the East Witch had her own little moment of “No Good Deed” before Dorothy arrived. Maybe she tried to do something good, something kind, and it backfired spectacularly. Like, she tried to rescue a kitten from a tree, and accidentally set the whole tree on fire. So, you know, bad luck all around. It happens. To everyone. Even the wicked.

Anyway, that’s my little coffee chat tangent for today. Thinking about songs, and witches, and the unexpected perils of owning property in Munchkinland. It’s a wild world out there, isn’t it? And it’s always more fun with a soundtrack, even if it’s just one you make up in your head. Cheers!